Part 12: Engage Physically - Mirror Them, Say What You Want Them to See, and Control the Room

Day 12: Engage Physically - Mirror Them, Say What You Want Them to See, and Control the Room

As we continue exploring the DENNIS system, today’s focus is on Engage Physically—a set of tactics that involve body language, environment control, and subtle cues to gain the upper hand in negotiations.

We’ve already discussed Mirror Them in a previous post ([link to “Mirror Them” post]), where we explored how subtly mimicking the other party’s body language can create a subconscious bond and build rapport. But what happens when you take it a step further?

Say What You Want Them to See

Building on the Mirror Them technique, Say What You Want Them to See involves using deliberate cues to influence your counterpart’s perception. This could be as simple as feigning disapproval when they discuss a topic they’re passionate about, or jumping in to agree with their criticisms. Essentially, you’re pretending to be emotionally aligned with their concerns.

While this isn’t much different from mirroring, it takes things up a notch by actively guiding their perceptions. It’s another way to “build rapport,” not through genuine connection or unique solutions, but by being someone you’re not.

In Dennis’s case from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, this kind of pretending is used to manipulate a “relationship.” In business, it can be used to squeeze out discounts or to coax unnecessary concessions. But let’s be clear—no one is saying don’t be friendly. The problem arises when you rely on pretending to be someone else, a tactic that should be reserved for truly hostile situations, not standard practice in your negotiations.

Control the Room

Control the Room is about mastering your physical environment to tip the scales in your favor, especially when you’re not on your home turf. Meeting at your own office naturally gives you an edge. You’re familiar with the space, know where everything is, and can subtly direct the flow of the meeting. From the moment your counterpart walks in, you have the opportunity to set the tone.

Choosing the meeting room, arranging the seating, and even timing breaks or refreshments—all of these elements give you control. You can position your team to subtly dominate the conversation, or to support each other effectively. If your counterpart is on unfamiliar ground, this unfamiliarity can make them more susceptible to your influence.

Negotiating on your home turf also allows you to showcase your company’s strengths. Whether it’s the impressive office space, your team’s professionalism, or the seamless organization of the meeting, it’s all part of controlling the narrative and keeping the other side a bit off balance.

However, if you’re not on home ground, there’s no need to lose that advantage. Bring someone along. A negotiation team not only helps share the mental load but also provides protection against miscommunication or manipulation. With a colleague at your side, you’re better positioned to spot and counteract tactics like Good Cop, Bad Cop or other aggressive strategies.

In the end, Control the Room isn’t just about physical space; it’s about controlling the flow of the negotiation, setting the stage for your success, and keeping the upper hand, whether you’re hosting or a guest.

#NegotiationTactics #DENNISsystem #BusinessStrategy #CorporateNegotiation #EthicalNegotiation #BodyLanguage #PowerDynamics #Leadership